Re: NOTHING but VENTS - Vent all you want without replies
About six months ago, my wife and I came up with a plan to FINALLY escape the South (US). We talked it over, ironed out any and all wrinkles, and transferring my job to Vermont where we have always dreamed of going. After we had literally all the kinks worked out, we let my sister and brother-in-law know and told them what we were going to do, as we knew both of them were fundamentally unhappy living in the South, too.
About the middle of October, my sister invites us out to dinner and she gives us this whole song and dance about how Maine is like Vermont, only better - especially for her husband who is retired military and exceptionally sick. Although we hedged and hemmed, we relented to change our plans in order to move up to Maine at her urging so that all four of us would have a support network in place. By the next week, their house was sold and in the process of closing and all that stuff (they lived in a pricey city/college town). My wife and I were not ready to go, yet, but we were told by them both that we would be welcome to stay with them, use their vehicle, and all that good stuff until we could get on our feet. We agreed, though with a huge amount of reservation, but we were worried about them, y'know? I'm the elder sibling. It's my job to look after her.
Turns out, Maine is not as..well..accommodating to transplants in the middle of winter. My job refused to transfer to Maine due to the shipping costs of my product line (after I had been assured it wasn't a problem) and it took me until last Tuesday to finally get a job. This caused my Bipolar 2 Disorder to kick in full tilt from the end of December up until..well...it hasn't stopped, yet and if you have, or know someone with this condition, you know it isn't pleasant. It basically robs you of your motivation to even live, let alone manage basic human functions like eating and sleeping. During this two month period, my sister goes out of her way to treat my wife like absolute human garbage and a slave. Then once my wife stopped interacting with her completely, she turned on me - speaking to me in condescending tones, "correcting" my mistakes with adamant disgust, or - as it has been this entire week - cooking literally all the food that we bought "for the house", as per our agreement, and then discarding it afterwards because it "didn't turn out right". I haven't eaten all week (since last Tuesday) because all we've had in the house that she hasn't destroyed yet is Pop Tarts and Ramen Noodles and I turned those over to my wife because I'll NEVER let my wife or our pets go hungry. I'll starve to death before that happens!
Last night, my Crohn's Disease flared up in a bad way after several months of remission and I got about forty-five minutes of sleep. After I walked my wife to work in a foot of snow and subzero temperatures, I came into my room and went to sleep. About two hours later, there came a banging on my door. Dear SIster wanted me to "get off my lazy rear end" and go shovel the driveway. I said I would and she demanded to know why it wasn't already done. I explained to her that, between finally getting my first day of work, walking my wife to work (because we've been denied use of the car at her instruction) and my Crohn's, I wasn't exactly feeling up to shoveling snow at 5 AM. She said that didn't matter because she "might" want to go somewhere later. I said fine, all you had to do was mention that and I would have done what I could to assist her exodus. Might have taken several hours, but it would have been done like the last time. After I finished shoveling, she says to her husband in a voice that I *know* she uses when she's trying to make sure she's heard by the person she's talking about that, "she'll be glad when we're gone" and that "we're leeching off of them".
For the record, we've bought all the groceries, helped clean and repair this 110 year old shack, shovel the snow every day it snows, put gas in the car (that we're forbidden from using), and helping out with whatever little odds and ends that are asked/demanded of us while she stays in bed until 10 AM, then goes downstairs and naps on the couch until 4 or 5 PM.
So after this final blowup this morning, I sat alone in our bedroom and cried for an hour and a half because my sister, my blood, used me and used my wife to fulfill her dream - yes, Maine is not where my BIL wanted to move to. He was fine with Vermont. My sister, the architect of this madness, screwed all of us over for her own selfish desires. I called my mother this morning and begged her to put together about $2000 for us to come back home with because we're flat broke. Then, as I was doing the house's laundry while waiting for the call back from my mom, my sister walks downstairs to the basement and goes, "You, your bumper sticker wife, and your fruiting pets need to be out this weekend." My BIL then came downstairs and said, "I tried to stop her. I don't know what's gotten into her, but I'm sorry."
I'm currently waiting for the call back.