Ah now men we've got a pretty little cat to confuse. Jolly good, Captain.

Get on with it!

"He is packing it in and packing it up And sneaking away and buggering up And chickening out and pissing off home, Yes, bravely he is throwing in the sponge."

"Run away!"

I could be arguing in my spare time.

Sit on my face, and tell me that you love me!

Now we see the violence inherent in the system!

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!

What's wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. Give her a kiss, boy.

Waaaa!

Arrrrrrgghh.

But I'm not dead yet!

I don't want to go on the cart!

Nudge nudge wink wink say no more!

You must chop down the tallest tree in the forest... with a HERRING!

I'm not dead yet.

Would you care for a wafer thin mint?

I am NOT the Messiah!

I'm Brian!

Now, leet's note ah'gue abowut 'oow keeled 'oow, this is s'pose tow bee ah 'appy acation!

"... he can join our quest to find the Holy Grail."

"He's already got one."

"He's already got one?"

Nudge, nudge! Know what I mean? Say no more! A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat, say no more, say no more!

...So they were force to eat Sir Robin's minstrels, and there was much rejoicing.

if you go to my brother's pet shop in Bolton, he'll replace it for you

(in Camelot's dungeon) Clap, clap, clap...